Helping People Reshape their Baggage and their Bodies  

Lynda Wise B.Sc., C.P.C.C.  
Weight Loss and Wellness Coach

September '11
Issue 76

What's in it for you?  A connection, some challenges, a few questions to encourage you to simply reflect about how you currently live your life versus how you want to live your life.  Feel free to share your thoughts with me;  I'd love to hear from you.  This is an invitation to focus on where you'd like to change and grow.  


1.  PERSONAL LIFE COACHING:   Ever Feel like a Victim?

What a Nut!!!!

3.  THOUGHTS FROM MY SWING:   Some words you may wish to avoid

1:  Ever Feel like a Victim?

Some folks are naturally assertive and some are more passive.   Whether this is innate or learned to begin with, has been debated frequently.   My personal belief is that even if you are basically adaptable and giving and most reluctant/scared/wimpy to speak up for yourself, you can definitely learn not to let yourself be run over by someone in your life who is more aggressive and yes, more powerful - maybe not a 10 on the bully scale but threatening to you.  The solution cannot be shared in a single paragraph but a small technique to help you can definitely get you on your way.

Think about a situation that comes up for you when you go with the flow and don't speak up.  You wish you could be more verbal but that's just not you!  You regret that you can't say something, damn it.   How about a different perspective...  the next time it happens is an opportunity for change and growing confidence.   Choose a small issue for best results - one that's likely to re-occur.   Find a quiet 5 minutes or so and think about how you would like things to be in this context.   Visualize all the positives with as much detail as possible - you have to really want it!!!!   Write down your vision.   Think about what you'd like to be able to say - and write it down as well.   Read it and reread it and memorize the words...  and then practice them.  Your rehearsal will go a long way.   You're actually putting yourself in ready mode.  

When the situation arises again, it's a no-brainer.   You'll be ready and know exactly what to say and how to say it!

And I'd love to know how it goes!

Need more help?   lyndawise@yahoo.com or 416-225-3535

2:  What a Nut!

I bet you thought I was referring to a specific oddball but I really wanted to write about the princely pistachio.  

Nuts, in general, walk a fine line between healthy and fattening.  Even though nuts are brimming with excellent nutrition, sometimes you shy away because of the calories.  Nutritionally, they are at their best when raw, (non-roasted) and unsalted and in measured quantities.

A new study suggests that human bodies don't absorb all the calories in pistachios, because some of the fat from this nut isn't totally absorbed by the intestinal tract.   Calorie-wise this makes only a small difference - nonetheless, here are some other positive results that are possible from the pistachio habit - depending on the quantity consumed:

  • eating pistachios could lead to a significant decrease in cholesterol, and may offer protection from some cancers and heart disease
  • pistachios contain lots of other vitamins and minerals
  • they're a rich source of plant protein
  • they contain mostly monounsaturated fat - same one as in olive oil
  • pistachios are an excellent source of fibre
  • shelling pistachios means they take longer to eat - so as a snack, one tends to eat fewer than most other nuts and still be satisfied
A serving of pistachios in their shells is roughly an ounce and is about 25 nuts, containing 150 calories.   And the best news of all.....they taste great!!!!  

Hate to repeat myself but portion control, portion control, portion control.

3:  Some words you may wish to avoid...

I recently found myself listening to a friend.   She was describing a situation which was almost identical to one I'd unfortunately experienced a long time ago.   I wanted to support her in the struggle and almost blew it!   There's an expression that's used with the absolute best of intentions that's somewhat false - and here it is "I know exactly how you feel".   The first time I actually thought about this was many years ago when I took my guidance counselor training.   Wow!   I'd said it so many times and actually believed that I knew exactly how someone else felt because the experience sounded so familiar.   But the teacher explained that you could definitely imagine how YOU would feel in that situation, but as empathic as one could be, it's impossible to crawl into someone else's brain to experience their exact reactions to whatever event brought you to the conversation.

Through the years, friends, family, and even professionals have said those words to me.   I knew they meant well.   They meant to sympathize and console or share my pleasure - but, my gut reaction was one of defense, thinking "How could you possibly know exactly how I feel if you aren't me?"

The quotation came up again when I took my coaches' training.   Same intentions, same issues.   It reinforced the point that as a coach and as a mother, sister, aunt, friend, etc., one cannot possibly totally know exactly what others are going through.  

So how can you be supportive?   Perhaps expressions like "you must be so frustrated" or "how devastating" or "I'd imagine that must be almost impossible to deal with" or "wow, that must put you on top of the world" - and I'm sure your own words will be better - will show your caring and understanding when that's what someone needs from you the most.

Wishing you what you wish for yourself!

*It will be my pleasure to treat you to a gift certificate for each referral who becomes a client!

To arrange for a complimentary coaching consultation,
an interactive coaching workshop,
or a speaker for a meeting or a conference,
contact Lynda Wise at Wise Coaching
416-225-3535 or lyndawise@yahoo.com
And please visit :  www.wisecoaching.ca

Individual and group Coaching is done by telephone.  
Workshops and speaking engagements are done in person.  
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Wise Coaching | 37 Rockland Dr.  | Toronto | Ontario | M2M 2Y8 | Canada